This is my story. Part tragedy, of self inflicted agony that rests deep within me.

Removed, numbed silenced.

…what is this feeling that I now live.

It’s strange and cold and empty and self indulged and so much worse than all those lies.

No words describe how I can’t look you in the eyes, a fraud, a cheat, I’m cruel and weak. I have no explanation of how this came to be, a sentence of death is handed to me, I got what I deserved, a life I cannot reverse.